Hookup culture today is very different from any time in history. Although physical intimacy is easier than ever before, many believe today’s hookup culture can be confusing and chaotic. No more throwing stones at her windows or writing notes at her door. It’s all about instinctual, quick decisions that can be made with just a swipe of a finger.
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Many people are able to identify what they are physically attracted towards in others. Perhaps a smile that makes you smile is enough to make you wet or your eyes are tingly because of the brown eyes. There’s a good chance there’s someone online who matches your physical characteristics. Online, you have the ability to be very picky. Although it may seem harsh, it is possible to be picky online. People like what they love and don’t want to spend their time on something that they aren’t attracted to. It doesn’t matter if you are on the same wavelength. You should instead approach finding a hookup the same way. You will find many attractive people who are large in the pool of people.
[Related to: The Complete FuckBuddy Guide]
Be truthful
This is why it makes sense to be your best self when you are putting together a bio and pictures. Keep in mind your goals when taking pictures. You don’t need to be sexy if you are looking for something hot and without mystery. You can choose photos that are not only sexy, but also mysterious if you’re looking for something a little different. Don’t Photoshop your photos, especially if you met via a hookup website. You will not be able to make a good impression on someone if you don’t look like your photos. You can use a filter, but it is best to keep it simple and true.
The opener
Ask yourself what you want. If you’re someone who is influenced by personalities, you will need to get to know the person and court them. You can have sex right away if you’re just looking for sex. Start the conversation with a confident compliment, or an open-ended question. You could try “Your eyes in this photo really turn my on” or “What kinda fun did you have over the weekend?” Both can be flirty and not overly eager.
Flirting
A great hookup is made of comfortability and a little excitement-nervousness. Begin by getting to know the other person. You can start by commenting on their responses and asking them light-hearted questions. If someone responds to your opening with “This week has been hectic, really needing to de-stress”, you can reply with “This week was really crazy! You can reply with, “What do you do to de-stress?” If you feel the need, you can add, “I know one thing I really help me lol.” This is not only flirty but also very personal. You might want to make fun of the person, perhaps by replying to their photo with something like “Did that outfit really go to Disney?” Is Mickey Mouse capable of keeping it in his pants? Relate, keep it smooth, and flirt. Consider the conversation as a wink.
Start the conversation
Once you have established that the conversation is on, switch to texting or social media. This shows that you have found the right app and are ready to meet up.
Meeting up
It is a good idea for someone to meet you in public before you move into the bedroom. If you and your hookup buddy are looking for a more intimate relationship, then it’s all about the sheets.
You will find a place to meet people that is private and has a good vibe. What does this mean? You can find a bar with intimate booths or a place where you can sit under a tree. You will feel calmer and more intimate because of the buzz and privacy. You shouldn’t meet in a noisy club or at a quiet restaurant. The former is too loud and the latter too serious to be considered for a hookup.
Make it a habit to greet each other warmly when you first meet them. Start with a hug. You will eventually have to do the dirty work, so it is a good idea to start by being warm. You will be able to project a friendly, outgoing attitude and you will get it back. You can offer to take the first drink if the person you are meeting is at a bar near your home.
This is also important. Take this opportunity to discuss your intentions and ensure that you are on the same page. If you don’t want to find anything serious, be clear and ask them for clarity.
Hooking up, The dos & don’ts
After the initial meeting is over, it’s time for the fun part. This will work and you can keep working if you are a great host. We have compiled a list of do’s and dont’s to make it easy.
Do’s:
- Tell your roommates you’re having a hookup.
- Before inviting someone over, make sure you clean up your home.
- Have some water, cola, or wine on tap. If you are prone to anxiety, a glass wine can help calm the nerves and improve the mood.
- If you enjoy chilling before getting down to the work, it helps to have some movie ideas in your head. Without direction, picking a movie can be difficult.
- Be Kinky.
- Describe what you want.
Don’ts:
- Do not have high expectations.
- Don’t delay in showing up.
- Do not be shy
- Do not kick your partner out once the deed is completed.
- Do not leave without saying goodbye.
- Do not overstay your welcome on the next day.
- Don’t get attached.
The Aftermath
Every hookup couple will have a different outcome. It is best to keep it cool. Ask if you would like to meet up again. Don’t be offended if they turn you away. Don’t get too excited if they are interested in hanging out. You will have to decide if you want to hook up with someone you can text casually. You should be aware that casual texting can lead to hurt feelings, so you need to be ready to deal with it if it does. Always be cautious and considerate when you send a drunken text message!
Be flirty, considerate, have fun and keep it light.